| Hey |
[Jul. 31st, 2009|07:16 pm] |
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I am too busy. |
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| P.S. |
[Apr. 3rd, 2009|06:06 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  calm | ] |
I had no problem telling you how miserable i was throughout it all. Now that I know what it's actually like to be truly in-love with someone and this happy. And I am, feeling tender and true love for someone like I never have before. I am getting my priorities straight and heading in good directions for once. not much has changed as far as home life goes, but for once I have looked past being miserable about it and have come to realize I am going to get through it.  It's only been a day since he has left and I really, really miss seeing his smile. |
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| I love you. |
[Feb. 22nd, 2009|07:37 pm] |
Lately,
I can successfully count on my hand my true friends.
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| Tuesday. |
[Jan. 25th, 2009|09:44 pm] |
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AWE. |
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| Hectic. |
[Jan. 15th, 2009|05:15 pm] |
 
You have won me.
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| God damn |
[Dec. 25th, 2008|10:47 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  confused | ] |
You. |
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| school? |
[Dec. 2nd, 2008|03:30 pm] |
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i wouldn't say that i dropped out... just quit going. |
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| Fact. |
[Nov. 24th, 2008|10:51 pm] |
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I am becoming a pro at letting people down. |
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| Hey. |
[Nov. 22nd, 2008|02:40 pm] |
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Bye. |
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| where making more friends would be easier. |
[Nov. 21st, 2008|07:09 pm] |
I want to go back.
My somber mood has become a huge burden to me and I hate that I feel like I cannot control it-Nor, honestly do I actually want to. Yet again do I feel much better being away from everyone, and alone, just at an ease by myself.
It actually feels good.
Apart from the fact people just do not get it. I hate to offend, but is it so weird to be out of sight like I want to be? I feel like an awful friend when i'm like this, almost selfish because I just want to be with me and pay nothing to others.
I honestly do not understand why it is I am like this though. I have a decent life, though very complicated at present, it's decent and I am very lucky. Yet I am still mad depressed over nothing? I don't get it.
I feel selfish.
School is slowly but surly killing me and with that I feel the battle wounds are so rough and deep that I may not come out of this pain.
I bame no one else but my father, for leaving me to struggle like he did.
I feel stupid that I cannot learn. I wish it felt as easy as it looks. I try. And now I've just had a loss of interests and am just losing touch with any acidemic sight I may have had. It's been such a struggle. And I want to learn. But all of it has made me lazy and un-motivated to do any such things.
Things feel like they've kind of stopped again. I feel like I am waiting for somthing to happpen, to get some sign of what it is I am suposed to be useful - in this so called life we have to contibute to each day.
And I do not know what to do.
I just know that i am content right now with being alone.
I am working on sending a few care packages and letters out around and about the world for some deeply cared about folks pretty soon.
Look out.
p.s. Thank you. |
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| Hello |
[Nov. 20th, 2008|07:55 pm] |
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again. |
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| x. |
[Jan. 6th, 2008|02:07 pm] |
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1/5/06
Me and René met lastnight. :)
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